Jenni's Jargon

the thoughts that run through my head

I have share Eternity with who??

cross-on-a-hill-12

This rape case at Stanford University has had me in a tailspin for a few days, just like a lot of the country. I kept hearing the phrase Rape Culture and had to look this up to see what the hell this was all about. I read on the Women Against Violence Against Women website that is a phrase coined by some feminists in the 70’s to show how the victims of rape are often blamed for their attack. I now understand where this phrase has a place in our culture, before I read about it, I was just pissed when I saw it!

You were drunk, your skirt was really short, you were flirting with me, you kissed me.”

Well to all of that I have to say “Fuck You!!” Now, I try not to use that type of language all the time but there are times it is warranted and this is one of those times. There is not one woman that I know (or maybe even on this planet) that wants to be sexually assaulted or raped. I can speak from experience that these actions can mess a person up for life. Yes, my name is Jennifer and have been a victim of sexual assault. I was assaulted by man I knew while in college. Since charges were not pressed, this man was not asked to leave school and I saw him every day on the way to class (I eventually dropped that class) and this messed me up for a long time. I almost flunked out of college, but instead I just left and didn’t finish. I have been through much therapy about this to help me cope, and while in no way was my attack as violent as the woman on Stanford’s campus, it was still traumatic for me. I did not have to go through a trial just to have him convicted and sentenced to 6 months as this woman did. I think that would have broken me even more. I am so enraged about this sentence that my faith in our justice system has been squashed like a piece of rotten fruit.

I think the thing that bothers me the most right now is the realization that if the man who assaulted me or Brock Allen Turner consider themselves to be Christian and have declared that Jesus is their savior (like myself and all other Christians) then they will be able to be in eternity with me (and all other Christians). This fact breaks my heart. I know that does not sound very Christian of me but its the truth. I’m reading a book by Nadia Boltz-Weber now called Accidental Saints and it about finding saints in the most unlikely people. When I recently heard Nadia speak, she talked about salvation and how we are all sinners. I agree with that, I know I am a sinner and so grateful that my faith says Jesus died for my sins and since I have that belief I will get to spend Eternity with those I love. However, that means the same for those who hurt us, commit horrible crimes, kill people, etc. How can this be?!?! I mean, I’m a sinner but my sins a little, aren’t they…I mean I haven’t killed anyone or raped anyone or physically hurt anyone.

Judging people, being unkind, yelling at my kid, lying, ignoring people/issues

Reading about the “Accidental Saints” opens my eyes even more. I generally tend to think I am open to a lot of situations and try not to condemn people for their situations. I also tend to think of myself a pretty good person, I mean…I volunteer, I work for a non-profit, I go to church…that counts for something, right? But what I am realizing is people don’t have to do all these things in their life to have salvation. They don’t have to live the type of life I choose, they don’t have to really do anything but accept Jesus into their hearts and they have the very salvation I have. Isn’t that a wonderful thing! Yes it is, but really, No it’s not!!

The fact of the matter is, I have to somehow come to the realization and acceptance that I will be spending Eternity with people I generally find unsavory and repulsive (like rapists, killers, and just “bad guys”). It is hard for me to accept that salvation is here for them the same way it is here for me but it is!! This is totally a test of my faith and I might struggle with this for a while as I figure out why God would want them in Heaven but I know there is some reason. #Faith #TrustGod #Imasinner

Jenni

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My Crazy Life…

So, I have not posted in a little while and I have to say that my life has been quite crazy in the last few weeks!! I know there are a lot of parents out there that are feeling the same way with the end of the school year.

Ethan 4th Grade

(L) Last Day, (R) First Day

My son completed 4th grade and had a wonderful year. He is quite sad that this year is over. No, really! He loved his teacher, had great friends in his class with him. I’m so glad he loves school because it makes our lives as parents much easier when we don’t have to fight about school work. I really hope he keeps this love of school forever!! I did what I always do each year and took a photo on the first day and one on the last day. It always amazes me how much he seems to grow up each year. This year really floored me because he has seemed to lose his “baby face” and moved right on in to “boy face” and I am not sure how I feel about this at all!!

 

With Sax

Last Band Concert of the Year

Even though he loves school, he is also very excited about summer. He will at home most of the summer playing outside with his friends, getting dirty, swimming, playing computer games, building Legos, reading and practicing his Saxophone!! He is very excited about going to Church Camp again this year. This is the 2nd year he will go to overnight camp for a full week!! I am not sure who is more excited, him or hubby and I! This is the week we get to watch what we want (even at 7:00), as loud as we want, eat a meal and have a conversation that does not include talk about computer games or bodily functions!

 

Spring Feast

New Board Members Being Installed

A couple of cool things happened in my life recently as well. Two weeks ago I went to the Regional Assembly for the Central Rocky Mountain Region of the Disciples of Christ Church called Spring Feast. It was a great weekend of worship, connection, learning, singing and fellowship. One of the coolest parts is that I was installed (for a second term) as the Secretary of the Board of Directors for our region and was given a beautiful Stole. It is quite an honor for me to be in this leadership role in our church and be able to be a part of the bigger picture. The DOC church really fits the bill when it comes to faith for me. The other cool part was meeting and hearing a sermon and keynote speech from Nadia Bolz-Weber. She was introduced to us all as a “Crusty Broad” and from first looks, one might think that but I found her to be quite an inspiring speaker and she really invigorated my faith!

 

Children's

500 hours pin

#2 cool thing that happened to me…..wait for it….. Each year Children’s Hospital Colorado does a dinner for all the volunteers to recognize achievements of some and just to say “Thank You” to all the volunteers. I love this event because they have a great slide show of all the volunteers doing the fun things we get to do and they give away some scholarships to the Jr. Volunteers, all of us who work together get to just sit down and talk to each other, its just an all around great time. Last year I was awarded a pin for being a volunteer for 5 years and I was really not expecting anything this year. However, I was awarded my pin for completing 500 hours. This means a lot to me because out of all the 500+ hours I have given, I can still remember some of the names of the kids, most of their faces and the gratitude shown by their parents when I come to give them a break! This pin represents many hours spent coloring, getting beat at a myriad of Xbox games, watching Disney movies (mostly Frozen), and just sitting on the floor and playing! I’m not trying to brag about this, mostly because there were people there with 3,000+ that were being recognized as well, but I’m proud to be a volunteer!

 

Now that school is out, let summer begin! I hope you and your family have a lot of fun stuff planned for this summer break!! I can’t wait to share some of our adventures with you!!

Jenni

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